Dave and I completed our pre-application to Americans for International Adoption and Aid (A.I.A.A.~ see link to the left) in Troy, Michigan tonight. I'll drop it in the mail tomorrow morning. One more step taken...
A.I.A.A. is the adoption agency that we will (hopefully!!) be working with in the states. The pre-application was a "getting to know you" of sorts... three pages long with preliminary questions about who we are, where we live, our income, medical insurace coverage, etc... The app also asked us to specify any medical needs that we would be willing to consider, and our age and sex preference for our adopted child. A more thorough application is to follow, if A.I.A.A. thinks that we are a family they would like to work with.
Dave and I had a long conversation (again) last week about whether or not we should try to have a girl. After we left our first meeting with J.D. a couple of weeks ago, we had agreed not to specify a gender preference and just see what might happen, fully knowing that there are many more boys needing to be adopted, and reasoning that, when you're pregnant, you can't just pick. Dave hasn't waivered at all from this thought, but last week I freaked out (some crying involved), aware that this is probably it for me. Knowing that this could be my last chance at having a daughter.
Dave asked me to take my W.O.W. weekend to think about it and so, on Friday morning, I called A.I.A.A. The woman that I spoke with said one thing to me in response to my question about our chances at having a daughter: "There are so many more little baby boys just waiting for homes. " (More tears shed, at the thought!!)
I didn't need the solitude of Loon Lake to make up my mind. With those 12 words, I knew that we couldn't ask for a baby girl when a baby boy might need us more. I wrote the following word on our application, under gender preference:
Either.
And now, we're starting to think about names for a baby boy.
boys are beyond the range of anybody's sure understanding, at least when they are between the ages of 18 months and 90 years. ~ james thurber
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Our Adoption Timeline
- December 23, 2009- Adoption Finalized.
- May 7th, 2009- Family circle complete in Madison.
- May 6th, 2009- Mama's got Rubin in Seoul.
- May 4th, 2009- meet Rubin
- April 23rd, 2009- Visa Interview
- April 22nd, 2009- TRAVEL CALL!!
- April 14th, 2009- Packet 3
- April 7th, 2009- NVC out
- April 1st 2009 (no foolin')- I171 received
- March 9th, 2009- I171H received
- February 27th, 2009- progress report from SWS
- February 24th, 2009- Fingerprinted at USIS
- February 19, 2009-Rubin's legals arrive in state.
- February 16, 2009- mailed referral acceptance.
- February 12, 2009- received referral paperwork.
- January 29, 2009- verbally accepted referral
- January 27, 2009- received unofficial referral.
- January 20, 2009- I600A received and filed with the Dept. of Homeland Security
- January 16, 2009- submitted I600A
- January 12, 2009- homestudy document complete.
- January 12, 2009-received Foster Home Licensing
- December 22, 2008- A.I.A.A. director approves application, establishes our file, and requests our homestudy documents from J.D.
- December 5, 2008- submitted Foster Licensing application.
- November 25, 2008- A.I.A.A. accepted official application.
- November 15, 2008- submitted formal application to A.I.A.A.
- November 13, 2008- final homestudy meeting.
- November 12, 2008- autobiographies completed.
- October 30, 2008- second homestudy meeting.
- October 22, 2008- received formal application from A.I.A.A.
- October 14, 2008- first homestudy meeting.
- October 1, 2008- submitted pre-application to Americans for International Adoption and Aid
- September 25, 2008- submitted application packet to Adoption Advocates, Inc.
- September 18, 2008- first meeting with social worker (J.D.)
- August 2008- decided to adopt
3 comments:
Good morning dear....I am tearing up at my computer this morning just imagining how hard this decision must be.
Thinking of you....and either way :-) this child, boy or girl is going to just be SO blessed to be part of your family.
What a supportive and wise husband you have! And who said you need to be pregnant to be hormonal! I'm sure what you're going through is perfectly normal for adoptive mothers-to-be. Of course you'd love to have a girl - I remember my friend Yolanda feeling the same way when her ultrasound revealed a second son. And of course the guilt at feeling that way. But I agree with Becca - whoever this child is who joins your family will be a lucky little one. I can't think of two better parents. love you lots.
Wow. What a tough decision--especially admirable because it means that you are adopting for such unselfish reasons. Congratulations to both you for your decision and to whatever lucky child is out there who just got two amazing parents.
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