I haven't sat down to a good blog post in a while. It's hard to write when things aren't perfect. It's even more difficult when things seem downright bleak.
We're all sick. Runny noses, sore throats, croup-y, bark-y coughs. Both Dave and Emmett have suffered from a fever. Emmett has a diaper rash to end all diaper rashes. Nothing says "misery" better than a baby with chapped buns.
I screwed up our Foster Licensing checklist (stupid thing didn't make any sense.) My medical information sheet was incomplete (how did I miss the TB test???) and I mistakenly put an "asset" under the space for our "liabilities" and A.I.A.A. called to tell me that Korea wouldn't think that we could afford our adoption. Grrrrrrr....
I got my car washed on Tuesday. And yesterday it snowed 4 inches.
The narrator's voice in Real Life Teens: Teens and Gangs is worse than fingernails on a chalkboard.
Andy has to work the day after Christmas.
Ugh.
No matter how hard I try, I can not keep up with the mess that is becoming my house. Theo's bedroom looks like a library after an earthquake. He doesn't quite get that his books belong on the shelf. My feet are met with sticky-ness (spilled apple juice, peanut butter, play doh) every other time I step down on the kitchen floor. The inside of my microwave is like a whole other world (science experiment in the making.) Who thought it was a good idea to teach boys, in the first place, to stand up when they pee??? I'm surprised I can even see these words as I type them, given the layer of dust on my computer screen.
Dave and I have been at odds. He would tell you that the paragraph I just finished is a complete fabrication, it's contents all a figment of my imagination. Ours is a house being lived in, he would argue, undeniably by two little boys. I admit my hysterical neurosis when it comes to housekeeping (you may remember my previous post, on "nesting") however...
We're all sick. Runny noses, sore throats, croup-y, bark-y coughs. Both Dave and Emmett have suffered from a fever. Emmett has a diaper rash to end all diaper rashes. Nothing says "misery" better than a baby with chapped buns.
I screwed up our Foster Licensing checklist (stupid thing didn't make any sense.) My medical information sheet was incomplete (how did I miss the TB test???) and I mistakenly put an "asset" under the space for our "liabilities" and A.I.A.A. called to tell me that Korea wouldn't think that we could afford our adoption. Grrrrrrr....
I got my car washed on Tuesday. And yesterday it snowed 4 inches.
The narrator's voice in Real Life Teens: Teens and Gangs is worse than fingernails on a chalkboard.
Andy has to work the day after Christmas.
Ugh.
No matter how hard I try, I can not keep up with the mess that is becoming my house. Theo's bedroom looks like a library after an earthquake. He doesn't quite get that his books belong on the shelf. My feet are met with sticky-ness (spilled apple juice, peanut butter, play doh) every other time I step down on the kitchen floor. The inside of my microwave is like a whole other world (science experiment in the making.) Who thought it was a good idea to teach boys, in the first place, to stand up when they pee??? I'm surprised I can even see these words as I type them, given the layer of dust on my computer screen.
Dave and I have been at odds. He would tell you that the paragraph I just finished is a complete fabrication, it's contents all a figment of my imagination. Ours is a house being lived in, he would argue, undeniably by two little boys. I admit my hysterical neurosis when it comes to housekeeping (you may remember my previous post, on "nesting") however...
It's my reality. I'm simply uncomfortable and unhappy in it when my house is a mess. It's magnified when none of us are feeling well, because I can only imagine that there are little germs and bacteria taking up residence here, hell bent on making us all feel worse!! All I want for Christmas, this week, is for my husband to clean the freaking toilets!
And, I want him to put up the outdoor Christmas lights like every other husband in my neighborhood. Why is it always me?! And why did I have to shovel all of the snow last night? I'm not feeling well, either. (Whiney, I know.)
I've decided to just go with this. For a minute, after I wrote that last sentence, I thought about deleting this entire post, certain that I must sound like a certifiable nutcase, the worst wife east of the Mississippi. But, it's the truth (that things aren't perfect at my house right now, not that I'm a nutcase or a bad wife!!) I get sick of reading the same old blogs, "everything here is perfect, we're so happy, look at how smart my kid is, how great my job is, how handsome my husband is, yada, yada, yada..." (I know that your husband bugs you sometimes, too. Don't try to tell me that he doesn't!!)
What I love is how I get it from Norbyah (my kid puked on my birthday) and Janiece (it's my anniversary and I'm serving Pizza Hut for dinner) and Angie (my dog died, and it sucks) and Shan (I had some really great goals last month, and some of them are my goals this month, too) and Becca (this McDonald's ad straight up pisses me off) and Greta (my house is in shambles, there's a ton of water in my basement) and Christine (not magical, not magical at all.) I appreciate their willingness to be real (this is when I plug for my sisters, who always tell it like it is, to start their own blogs, too.)
I know that, when I'm feeling a little crazy myself, when things are less than perfect, I can look to any of these ladies and know that I'm in good (less than perfect) company.
And, I know some of their husbands personally, so I realize that Dave is in "good" company, too. (Hi Joey!!)
13 comments:
Hell Yeah! This is one of my favorite posts so far! I could definitely share some good husband stories if you wanted me to. For example....why can't Nate remember to shut down the GD computer at night. It always wakes me up and i have to get my butt out of my warm bed and go shut it off because i dn't want to burn energy all night long. Whew! THat felt good! :) Keep em coming!
I could write a life-time-away in response to this blog. In fact, I think I will. First up, many claps for your brutal honesty. There is certainly not enough of it in the world - and just not the blogging world. Secondly, an ordered house leads to an ordered mind. There is nothing wrong with wanting a clean and organised home. That's what helps us to keep in control of our world. Thirdly, a friend of mine recently was talking to me about her relationship with her husband (they have three boys under four!), and she commented that she wished her husband thought like her in regards to their home and their children, then everything would be okay. Fourthly, no one has a perfect life. Those that boast an oh so perfect life are living a more than less than perfect life - in fact, it's probably downright miserable. Finally, it is vital to find solace in other like-women. You are not alone. xo
Talk about LESS than perfect, I wrote a bloody comment and it's not here! Ugh! It was long too. UGH! Now I've got to recompose it. I'm too pissed off to do it now. But know that I'm thinking of you and I'll comment soon.
This post rocks! I feel closer to you already...and I can relate to EVERYTHING! Thanks for being so real!
Okay, so here was what I had written before. I so wish I could go for that long walk with you, or for retail therapy at H&M and especially a good coffee in the cozy chairs at CB. Your post made me miss you and feel so far away, yet at the same time feel very connected. I totally understand the 'house is a mess' induced grumpiness. You and I are so much alike in this respect. Despite my incredible fortune to have Eva do our cleaning, I will still get the shits sometimes when I look around and I see piles...everywhere. Things to be sorted, crap to be tossed away. I'd just like my mirror to be hung on the wall. I'd like to put pictures up. Do you know what I didn't put in my birthday post? The fact that the reason I woke up early to compose myself was because I'd been crying. I went to bed crying because after a long night at book club and dashing out to get wrapping paper, I came home and Joey had gone to bed without taking out the presents for me to wrap for Buddy. I mean, how could he forget his son's birthday? Then, when Buddy climbs into bed, I feel that it's Joey undoing all my hard work and sleepless nights trying to get him to go back to bed...So these days when I'm frustrated, I just cry... and I was upset for waking up on my birthday crying. And I didn't want Buddy to see me crying. I hope things get better for you soon. And I'm glad Dave and Joey aren't alone - the truck/couch can get awfully cold some nights I'm sure. I love you dear friend.
HAHA--well, I'm right up there with you. For the past two Christamses I have wished for someone--ANYONE--to clean my toliets. Still waiting. Sigh--guess it's up to me. I currently have paint chips up on my living room wall trying to decide what looks best and one area of the wall I just patched--looks like total crap right now. I can't even wade into the boys' room (that's what God invented doors for--just close the door on the mess), some of the outside Christmas lights are up but it's too cold to get the others up, and I had the GI flu twice in 2 weeks--the second time was REALLY UGLY, and I do think there is a fridge under the messy fingerprints and whatever the kids have on the door. I won't put up the Christmas tree until they clean up the basement--so good luck with getting a Christmas tree this year! Good thing I work this weekend--maybe Ted might get that done!
Don't worry about the adoption paperwork. It happens alot--that's why so many people double-check stuff. It's all in God's good time and he's the one with the calendar, not us. Let me know when you are feeling better--we need to have a "therapy" session (drinks, snacks, coffee,shopping, chocolate shopping, all of the above!)
oh, relief. an honest to goodness, honest to goodness post. i was laughing out loud, especially when i got to the part about us, your sisters. thing is, if i started a blog, they'd all be like this. although it's totally unlike me, and i bet if i came over to your house right now i'd think it looked just fine, i understand YOUR need for order. remember what we talked about last week, about our husbands. we both did well. dave told me about some outlandish gift he considered for you the other night. write down the lights and the driveway and the toilets.... they'd cost him a lot less. but, good luck on the toilets.... i've been married twice as long as you and still haven't had any help on that one. sorry about the paperwork, but like janiece said, it will all work out. maybe it was just the slow down you needed to allow for your vacation in march. again, i loved this post, and i'm impressed that you let it all hang out.
I was getting nervous that I come across as having a perfect life (cause I so don't) and then I saw my name as one of the ones getting a "pass"! WHEW! ;-)
Oh - and my house is a sty as well... I have boxes all over the place from decorating for the holidays, and things that still need to go up all over the floor. And don't even get me started on my office. You can't even *see* my desk of half of my floor... and it's right off the foyer _with_no_door! There's piles of *stuff* in every room right now. And the sad part?! I'm the only one who's been here!! :-/
oh emily....if only i could compose the perfect response....one that would write away the science project in your microwave, tack the lights up on your house, and even out your "odds"....but...in the absence of that....i guess i'll just say thank you...i'm sorry....and....this too shall pass. bit by bit....bird by bird, things will get better. just hang in there. like sharyn said...you are not alone. just know too, that you also make me feel less alone. xn
great post! you said so many of the things i have been thinking over the course of this week. i put up the lights in the freaking cold too, and i know i will also be the one dragging out all the christmas boxes this weekend. as for the house, it is also a mess, and I have a husband who looks around and says "what mess?" aaaghh. i feel a bit better now.
I'll bet ya never had so many comments on a post before! I just wanted to say... yipee! I've read your post for over a year now and am always in admiration at your ability to see the best parts of every day/situation you write about. i started to wonder if you ever had a truly crappy day?!! but you do and it makes me happy. I'm obviously not enjoying your misery, just finding some comfort in the fact that I'm not the miserable moaning cow i sometimes feel like for having days or weeks like you've jsut written about. Your and norbyah's blogs set the tone for me when i began my own and I'll confess that I edit like a mad woman. I don't have any family (other than Don) subscribed to my post because I know myself and I know that one day I'll want to write a crazy pissed off post about something some family member said or about a visit to the in laws and I want to be able to do that freely!! Vent all you need to. It'll pass. x
Whoa...sorry I am so late to post on this one. Well done. I love the honesty. And I totally relate. So thank you!! Just today...I was looking around at my own house thinking. WOW. Not good. :( I am sorry about the paperwork...I am sorry that you all are sick. You have inspired me to post more honest or True Life:Becca doesn't always smile all the time posts. I love you girl. Wish I was closer to you. I'd hang those Christmas lights for you myself.
Oh boy. I thought it was just me and the weather, but I'm glad you're getting a bit testy with your husband and your surroundings as well. So what's the final outcome of the Korea adoption? Will they let you adopt or not? And a TB test? Small detail. I do like that Dave expects you to put up the Christmas lights and shovel, though, because it makes you seem even more bad-ass. Did I mention Beaver hasn't shaved since the wedding? No joke. Who are these people we call our husbands???
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